The Ugly Truth About My Pregnancy

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When I see women with their cute baby bumps, I look back at my pregnancy pictures and wish I would have enjoyed it a little more.

I didn’t have the picture-perfect pregnancy. I became pregnant right before my college graduation, and my husband still had a year of undergrad to go. Once we found out, we frantically attempted to “figure things out”. I didn’t tell a lot of people at first. I’m not completely sure whether I didn’t because Evan and I weren’t married or what, but it definitely played a big factor. I was worried about what other people would say and didn’t really allow myself to be excited in the beginning.

Then came pregnancy issues. I woke up one day and couldn’t keep anything down. I was in so much pain and didn’t have a clue what was happening. Fearing something was wrong, I went to the emergency room later that night to find out that our baby was okay. As it turns out, I had Hyperemesis Gravidarum. In short, it’s severe morning sickness that affects about 2% of pregnant women, and I just so happened to be one of the lucky few. So just when I thought about being excited, this severe morning sickness hit me like a ton of bricks. I had to take medicine every time I wanted to eat and even had to wear seasickness bands, which were very attractive.

As the months of my pregnancy went on, my friends at the time began calling less and visits became scarce. I couldn’t do the things we used to do and didn’t have the energy to go places, when I was invited. My family was an hour and a half away, so I couldn’t make frequent visits. I felt isolated.

I worked at a resturant, and I was there almost every day and night. During my second trimester, the weight started to pile on quickly. By the end of my pregnancy, everything was swollen. At that moment, I felt so ugly. I was miserable. But why did I let those things bother me? I was carrying a human life.

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The day Ella was born, I completely forgot about the previous 9 months. Beginning with that moment, I was exactly who I was supposed to be: her mother.

I look back now and wish I would have done it differently. I wish I would have put forth the effort to be happy, to not worry about what others thought and focus on having a healthy pregnancy. I wish I would have eaten healthier and enjoyed myself.

My point in sharing this is to say: enjoy every minute of being pregnant. There are couples that unsuccessfully try their entire lives to become pregnant, and God gave us that opportunity. Friends will come and go, but family is forever. Cherish this time. Live in the moment and embrace your beautiful pregnant body.

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